she was so not down for the gang bang
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
50% drunk capacity currently
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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