What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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