Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
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