whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
where are my eyebrows?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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