I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Randomize
