we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
