i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Randomize
