Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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