Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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