That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
