And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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