She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Randomize
