the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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