Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
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