i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
