There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
two words...techno handjob
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
