Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
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