If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
