your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
