One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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