I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
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