yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
worst night to have a conscience
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize