Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
