I love black thongs
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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