Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
When did angry sex become our thing?
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
