Well douche your snatch and let's go!
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
