I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
