if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
