and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
