It's a beautiful day for a hangover
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
