I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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