wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
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she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
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we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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