fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize