I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
