It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
ok first of all what the fuck
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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