can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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