When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
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I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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