I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
