my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
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