Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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