margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Randomize
