what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
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