Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
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