Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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