I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
