I swear she didn't look like that last week.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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