The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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