WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Randomize
