So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
