We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize