Small penises have feelings too.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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