he was CRYING into my vagina
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
