She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
My vagina just recognized that song.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Randomize
