Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
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